One promise I try to keep is to complete at least one chapter of 
"Amazing Grace" every month.  To have a deadline is the only way I'll 
complete anything.  (Just ask any of my friends.  I'm the world's best 
procrastinator!)  This month I have kept my promise, though barely.  
Here is the last chapter to "Amazing Grace: Facing Mother(hood)."  
Please know that this is a series.  You must read the previous stories 
to know what's going on.  You'll find a list of the stories at the end 
of the chapter.

I want to apologize if the plot seems to be going slowly.  I assure you 
it will pick up in this chapter.  "Facing Mother(hood)" is my way of 
introducing most of the characters and giving some background 
information.  (You never really know a person until you know his past!)  
Like most expositions, they're either slow, boring, or both.  I hope 
this hasn't been boring, but I'll agree if you say it's a bit slow.  
And I want to thank you for reading this far.  Thank you thank you 
thank you!

And don't forget I love email.  So do me a favor and send me any 
suggestions, praise, criticism, complaints, or any ten-dollar bills 
that you may have.  (Okay, okay, I'll do without the money!  ^^;) My 
email address is at the bottom as well as my web site address.  Once 
again, thank you!




Amazing Grace: Facing Mother(hood)

By: Masked Maiden

Chapter There: Worth it All




The sun descended into the horizon and soon night came.  Tiny specks of 
light decorated the ebony sky, enveloping hectic Tokyo in a blanket of 
serene bliss.  It was a contrast to the day Megumi had, and her day was 
hardly over yet.

Megumi stood on the fire escape.  She stared past the city and past the 
stars, to a place she could only journey to in her daydreams.  But 
shortly she drifted away from her sweet reverie and stared at the 
shimmering, three-karat diamond ring she wore on a gold chain around 
her neck.  It always brought her back to reality, her engagement 
ring -- the very same engagement ring Joben gave her only eight month 
ago.

The memory of his proposal was still fresh in Megumi's mind.  It 
happened right after her high school graduation.  Joben pulled her 
aside and escorted her to the track field; one of the few places immune 
from the populated crowd.  As they sat on the sun-warmed bleachers he 
retold the first time they met, the day when a senior boy met a 
freshman track star at a Wednesday afternoon meet.  After he was 
finished, Joben bent down on one knee.  As he slipped the ring on 
Megumi's finger he asked her to be his wife.  Without any hesitation, 
Megumi accepted. 

An extravagant proposal wasn't necessary.  The simplicity of the moment 
made it all the more romantic.  Megumi knew without a doubt that Joben 
loved her.  Her engagement ring was a symbol of his love -- an eternal 
circle with no beginning or an end.  She knew they would spend the rest 
of their lives together.  He would never leave her.

Or at least, she believed it.  

For the six months since Joben left, Megumi continued to wear her 
engagement ring.  She recently bought a gold chain for it after getting 
fed up with soaping her swollen finger just to take it off before a 
shower.  Every time she caught a glimpse of it she began to wonder of 
the life she could have had, a life with Joben as her husband and as 
the father for their baby.  It was a sweet mirage she once held on, but 
not anymore.  Today marked a milestone in Megumi's life.  She realized 
and accepted the fact that Joben was not coming back.  She understood 
it.  Enough time had passed for him to change his mind and returned to 
her.  But even with Joben out of her life, he was forever a part of it.  
They made a child together.  His memory always came back to Megumi when 
she felt her baby move inside of her.  She could only imagine the 
experience when she looked into her baby's eyes for the very first 
time...

There was one other thing she accomplished that day -- Megumi faced her 
mother.  The dread that weighed so heavily on her shoulders was gone.  
Unfortunately, their encounter went just as she expected.  But it 
didn't matter.  No matter how much Anjeru begged and pleaded (and 
demanded), Megumi would not listen to her.  Her mistake was living with 
Joben.  Her mistake was not her baby and no matter what she was going 
to keep her.

<I wish Oka-san could understand that...> 

One thing remained uncompleted and that was facing motherhood.  
Throughout the fear and doubt she more than occasionally felt (not to 
mention the countless of times she told herself she wasn't ready) 
Megumi couldn't wait for that day to come. 

Karei had waited long enough.  She got a telephone book and found the 
number to the Drake Hotel.  She wanted to touch base with her parents 
before she, Megumi, Hanako, and Setsuko left for the restaurant and if 
her parents were still arguing then they'd just have to take a time 
out.  She wanted to tell them that she decided to stay with Megumi 
until the baby was born or maybe permanently.  Life back in Kobe would 
never be the same now that her mother's pride revealed her true colors 
and so Karei preferred to stay away from the war zone. 

The receptionist answered and Karei asked, "Could you please connect me 
to room 409?"

"One moment please."  The receptionist's voice came back on the line 
after a short pause.  "I'm sorry, but your party is unavailable.  Shall 
I take a message?"

Karei was stunned.  "Not available?"  <Great, someone killed someone!>  
"Did they leave any messages for me?  My name is Mitsukai Karei."

"I'm sorry, they didn't.  Was the lady in your party Mitsukai Anjeru?"

"Yes, ma'am.  She's my mother."

"Well I'm afraid your mother turned in her key to the room only a few 
minutes ago.  She left a message for your father before she left.  He 
hasn't returned yet."

"Did either one give any information as to where they were going?"

"I'm afraid not."

"Okay... could I leave a message for my father then?" 

Karei gave the receptionist the message and hung up.  It was now 
nearing six thirty.  Karei rose and joined her sister on the fire 
escape.  She placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled apologetically 
when it startled her.

"I called the Drake," she informed.  "Papa's not there and Oka-san has 
flown the coop."

Megumi eyebrow arched.  "What do you mean?"

"She turned in her room key.  I bet she went to the train station and 
bought a ticket back to Kobe."

"Well, I'm not that surprised.  I knew she was too stubborn to come to 
terms with this."   Megumi looked up at the sky and decided to change 
the subject.  She didn't appreciate being the core of everyone's 
problems, especially her mother's problems, so she had no interest in 
discussing them at the time.  

"You always hear that you can't see the stars in the city," she said.  
"You can certainly see them tonight.  It's almost like heaven." 

"It is beautiful," Karei agreed, "but I think I'll always prefer the 
Kobe skies.  Don't you?"

Megumi shrugged.  "I don't know... I'm getting used to Tokyo..."

Karei wasn't surprised to hear her say that.  "Well, you always said 
you weren't meant to live in Kobe.  Maybe Tokyo is supposed to be your 
home."  She stepped back into the apartment.  "Hanako-san and Setsuko-
san will be here in an hour.  You should probably start getting ready."

"Arigatou.  I'll be inside in a minute."

Karei left the sliding door opened a crack.  She sat down on the couch 
Indian style.  With the TV remote in her hand, she searched for 
something interesting to watch for the remaining hour before their 
Girls' Night Out began.

Megumi stared at her ring one more time.  She toyed with it, and then 
laid it in the palm of her hand.  It shined ever so brightly in the 
moonlight and the fabricated city lights.  Light was often the disguise 
for darkness, though.  Her ring may look appealing, but Megumi knew the 
truth behind it, what it really stood for -- a broken heart and broken 
dreams.

Well, she wasn't going to allow her to cling onto the past.  She made 
her decision.  She was going to do it.

She watched the ring slide off the gold chain and into her palm.  With 
a fierce overhand, Megumi threw the ring into the abyss of the night-
stricken city.  Like the boy who tossed her aside for his own 
selfishness, she could do the same to him.

"Goodbye, Joe..." 

Her sense of relief was deadened by a dull, throbbing pain in her lower 
back.  She reached around to massage the area, hoping that would ease 
the pain.  It helped somewhat, but after a moment or two it started 
again.

<Well, what do you expect, Megumi?  You're standing outside in the 
November cold with a bowling bowl attached to your hips, and you've 
been standing in one place for a rather long time I might add.> 

Megumi closed the sliding door behind her and walked to the bathroom.  
She turned on the water and then the showerhead, using her arm to test 
the water before she stepped in.  When the water was at the perfect, 
hot temperature (the temperature that massaged aching muscles and 
relaxed a troubled mind), Megumi made sure the bathroom door was also 
closed.  It didn't matter if it was her sister or her best friends, 
Megumi did not want anyone walking in on her.  She could hardly look at 
her own reflection.  She felt fat, gangly, unattractive... was fat 
already mentioned?  But whenever she did look at herself in the mirror, 
she had wonder if it were utterly possible for her to get any bigger.  
Megumi knew she would, but she just couldn't see how. 

She kept her back to the running shower for most of the time, hoping 
its healing waters would take away her pain.  While it subsided for a 
brief while, the pain did not go away completely.  Instead, it 
worsened.  The pain spread from her back to her front.  It then 
intensified.  Her back was now not the only part of her body in agony; 
it was as if her entire body was on fire. 

<This is *not* working.  I should probably get dressed and sit down for 
a while.>

Megumi dried herself off with a large towel and wrapped her bathrobe 
around her body.  She went to her bedroom, dressed, and sat down at the 
foot of her bed for a while.  It felt wonderful to sit down, she did 
not want to get up.  Perhaps this was what she needed to do before she 
left with her friends, to rest.  If that were the case then she was not 
going to object.  At least her agony had subsided.

Subsided -- it did not mean to leave.

<At least it's not as bad as it was while ago.  I can live it like this 
for an hour or so.>

Megumi soon heard the voices of Nomiya Setsuko and Ijirashii coming 
from the kitchen.  They were accompanied with Karei and were discussing 
an important matter for the evening -- which movie to see after dinner.  
Megumi shook her head and then took a peek at her alarm clock, knowing 
she did not spend an hour in the shower.  It was only six-fifty.  She 
decided to stay in her room for ten more minutes before joining the 
girls.

Megumi smiled.  Hearing Setsuko's voice was a miracle tonic.  She'd 
wanted to see her all day, to speak with her, but her classes at the 
college kept her busy in the afternoons.  She knew Setsuko appreciated 
a break from it all, especially with her fiancé still lived in Kobe.  A 
dinner and a movie with her loved ones was an excellent way for the shy 
and quiet young adult to start the weekend.  

"I'm serious!" Setsuko exclaimed.  "The movie we have got to see is 
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid!  I'll give you one good reason why, 
and it's Robert Redford!" 

Megumi's brow rose.  <What happened to shy and quiet?>

She laughed to herself when she heard Karei announce, "I don't care if 
the gods show their faces in the movie.  I will not see a Western!"

The clock read one minute past seven o'clock.  Megumi arose with 
carefulness and made it halfway down the hall before agony attacked 
again.  It was the same pain as before, except Megumi swore it was more 
intense.  She leaned on the wall until it passed on, and she was 
grateful when it did.  It was then that she had an inkling of what was 
really going on.

<This can't be.  It's too early!>

Everyone looked up when Megumi entered the kitchen.

"Hey, chick!" Karei chimed.  "What took you so long?"

"Megumi-chan," Setsuko said, "why is it I'm always the last one to know 
things?  Why didn't you tell me about Anjeru-san?!"

Megumi did not respond to their questions.  Her attention was fixated 
on Hanako.  She knew Hanako would know what was going on.  She'd been 
married for a little over ten years and twice given birth, one boy and 
one girl.  Tragically, Hanako lost her first child to sudden infant 
death syndrome.  Megumi remembered retelling her conversation with her 
mother to Hanako that afternoon.  She knew it was like placing salt on 
an opened wound -- here a woman was telling her daughter to give her 
child away when Hanako wanted nothing more but to have her little boy 
back in her arms.  Anjeru had affected more than one life during her 
visit, more than she would ever know.

Hanako started to feel uncomfortable with the continuing gaze.  
"Something wrong, Megumi-chan?"

Megumi managed to voice her question.

"Hanako-san... what's a... contraction supposed to feel like?" 


~*~*~


"Hey, Chiba!"

<Great, just what I need tonight...>

After a quick shower and a change of clothes, Hitori drove to an old 
tavern located three blocks away from his apartment in Bunkyo-ku, 
Tokyo.  The building was the oldest on the block, a survivor to the 
ever-growing metropolis of shopping centers and department stores, 
while looking better than most of the more recent buildings.  Hitori 
recalled the days when he came here drown his own body in alcohol, 
never really remembering how he ended back at his apartment.  Now it 
was his Friday night ritual to sit down at the bar, order himself a 
coke, and wait for his girlfriend's shift to end.  Naturally, he was 
the only customer that received a kiss with his order.  As one of the 
bartenders, his girlfriend made sure she was the only one that waited 
on him.  No one dared to argue.

"Chiba!  Over here, man!"

Hitori inwardly groaned and glanced over his shoulder.  Just as he 
feared, his assumption was correct.  A group of four off-duty policemen 
from the precinct were huddled around a table at the front of the 
tavern with enough booze to start their own bar is they wished.  The 
scrawny cop beckoned Hitori to come over.  Hitori cocked his head and 
timidly waved back before he turned his back on them.  He couldn't help 
it.  While they were good at their job and fairly decent men, Hitori 
couldn't trust himself around them.  Or more correctly, the booze they 
drank.  It'd been four months since his last taste of alcohol.  
Temptation already clawed at him every time he stepped foot in the 
tavern.  He did not want those claws persuading him to put a long neck 
bottle to his lips.  He'd worked too hard to get where he was today to 
just simply fall off the wagon.

<Akane better know how much I love her... I wouldn't keep coming here for 
anyone!>

The scrawny cop banged the table a couple of times with his mug of 
beer.  "Chiba, come on over here!  I'll buy you a drink."

Hitori swirled around on his stool.  "You know, I really don't have the 
time," he emphasized.  "I'm only here to--"

The cop interrupted him.  "Oh don't kid around.  One beer's not going 
to hurt you.  You should really know that by now!"  His laugh did not 
make things any easier.

His husky friend elbowed him.  "Don't push him, bud.  Everyone knows 
that Officer Chiba 'Hit Man' Hitori doesn't drink anymore.  He's got 
religion now."

<Got religion?  They make it sound like I bought it at a mall.> 

"Oh yeah, I forgot that.  He's Mr. Goody-goody now, one of them 
churchgoers.  You quit the boozes and the cigarettes, ne?  Then just 
sit down a talk a bit.  Mingle with the dames.  You still do *that*, 
don't you?"

Hitori was about to speak when a fervid brunette leaned over the bar 
and wrapped her arms around his neck to embrace him.  Her very presence 
helped him control his anger.  She couldn't have picked a better time 
to show up.

"I hope he doesn't," Akane teased, and kissed her boyfriend on the 
cheek.  "Sorry, boys, but he's with me tonight."

"And I don't mingle with dames," Hitori added, grinning from ear to 
ear.  "I converse with ladies." 

Hitori and Akane grabbed their coats and left the tavern arm in arm.  
The four policemen kept their eyes on the picture-perfect couple until 
they were out of sight.  It was amazing how someone like Hitori had a 
girlfriend when none of them could even get a woman to look at them to 
more than a second.  It was something to look into, but not now.  Their 
beer was getting stale. 

"I would really love to quit my job here," Akane complained, "but my 
uncle doesn't think my reasons are good enough." Akane started to mimic 
her dear ol' uncle.  "'You're just sensitive.  The waitresses don't 
complain when the guys hit on them.  And also, that boyfriend of yours 
should stop coming here and drinking up the coke for the rum and 
coke.'"

Hitori joked, "If he'd start selling Pepsi I would!" 

Akane wanly smiled, yet her smile quickly disappeared.  "I understand 
he needs the help.  He never had any kids, so I'm about the one kin he 
can count on.  But I don't like being around drunks all day.  And I 
know you don't either.  Argh!  I should just quit without notice!"

Hitori stopped walking and trapped Akane in a loose embrace.  "Have I 
told you today that I love you?" he asked.  He hated it whenever her 
hot temper flared, yet he always knew how to extinguish the flames.

"Yes," Akane smiled, "but I'd like to hear it again."

He leaned in to kiss her.  "I love you..."

"I love you too." 

Just as their lips met, Hitori remembered something.  He didn't know if 
it was more important than kissing his girlfriend, but he stood 
straight up and muttered an "Oh crap..."  

"Hitori, you have very bad timing!"

"I forgot." 

"Forgot what?"

"The concert tickets.  I left them at my place."

She laughed.  "Aww, poor thing.  Well, we're not in a big hurry.  We'll 
just run by your place and pick them up.  Now this time, kiss me!"

And so he did. 


~*~*~


Megumi lay on her left side on the couch, just as her doctor 
instructed.  She listened as Karei talked to him on the phone, 
informing her on the precautions to take.  False labor pains were 
already ruled out.  Movement did not ease the pain at all, and the 
contractions were consistent.  So the girls were to time her 
contractions for about one hour.  If she had five or more contractions 
within the hour, they were to call him back and report to the hospital 
immediately.  There was a slight chance the contractions would stop on 
their own, but Megumi seriously doubted her luck could be that great.  
And besides that, she didn't believe in luck. 

Karei took off her watch and handed it to Hanako, who volunteered to 
time the contractions.  "Tell us when the next one starts," Hanako 
told.

"Don't worry, the screaming pregnant woman will notify you," Megumi 
deadpanned.

It was the longest hour in Megumi's life.  As the pain the contractions 
brought ascended and descended like an infernal roller coaster ride, 
all she could think about was her baby.  Even though her daughter was 
still in the womb, she loved her beyond expression.  The very thought 
of losing her was more torturous than the pain Megumi endured.  She 
remembered the countless sleepless nights of staring at the ceiling and 
fearing she could not be a good mother.  Now that fear transformed into 
the horror of never having the chance to be a mother.  Megumi knew the 
chances of her baby surviving at such a premature state were slim to 
none.  Her baby meant everything to her.  If she lost her baby, then 
her life would cease to exist.

<I can't think like this.  I have to think positively.  But... Oh please, 
don't take my baby away...>

At the end of the hour, five contractions were counted.  Setsuko leaped 
from her seat on the floor beside Megumi and made a beeline for the 
phone.  She told them to go ahead to the hospital while she called the 
doctor.  After that, she would go to the Drake Hotel and wait for 
Megumi's father to return.

"I'm the only one left that he knows," Setsuko said.  "And I know he'd 
rather hear this news from a familiar face."

Karei grabbed her sister's car keys from her pocket book and opened the 
door.  "I'll do the driving.  Let's go." 

Hanako helped the expecting mother off the couch and to her feet, and 
soon the three women left the apartment.

Megumi experienced the longest twenty seconds in her life when waiting 
for the elevator doors to open.  She began to wonder if some couple had 
pressed the stop button just so they could have a few minutes of 
"privacy."  Or perhaps her impatience was only trying to think of ways 
to blame someone for the elevator being so incredibly slow!

At last, the door opened.  Megumi was surprised to see a couple *was* 
occupying the elevator, a tall brunette with her dark-haired boyfriend.  
It was rather ironic, but her boyfriend looked mysteriously like...

"Well, isn't this a surprise," Hitori greeted.  "Didn't expect to see 
you--"

"Hitori, we're in a hurry," Hanako interrupted.  "There's not time for 
the small talk!"

His brow rose.  "Nani?  Is something wrong?"

Megumi barked, "Just let us in!"

Now, Hitori was no genius, but he was a trained observer.  Megumi was 
no more than six months along in her pregnancy.  With her boyfriend out 
of the picture, he admired her for keeping the baby.  Her name was not 
the only thing he knew.  From the stories Hanako constantly told him, 
Hitori practically knew her entire life.

Something Hanako forgot to mention was her attitude.  Hitori knew mood 
swings were associated with pregnancy, but how long could one last?  It 
wasn't until he noticed a wetness running downward onto the carpeted 
floor.  His medical knowledge was limited, but even he knew that was 
not supposed to happen, especially to a woman who was only six months 
pregnant.  When he realized that, he nearly panicked.  Chiba Hitori, 
one of Tokyo's finest, almost panicked.  This was not his wife or even 
his girlfriend, but he would be sharing the same elevator with her.  He 
hated to admit it, but he didn't know if he could handle that.  <Oh 
crap, just like on TV.  This elevator will stop and she'll have that 
baby in front of us all!>   While he felt that way, he also wanted to 
help.  She already knew he was trustworthy, so why not volunteer to 
drive and the others to the hospital?

He extended his arm to cease the doors from closing.  "Get in!"

Akane had not been paying attention until her boyfriend's voice pulled 
her away from her daydream.  That was when the scenario registered in 
Akane's brain.  "Oh God..." She then had the same thought as Hitori: did 
these ladies need any help?

The four ladies and one man fit snuggly in the elevator.  They all made 
sure Megumi had the most room, even though it probably would not make 
much difference.  Hanako stayed close to her, however, and coached her 
through another contraction.  From the corner of her eye she took a 
glance at Hitori.  He wasn't as distressed as she expected him to be.

"You know, my car's right out front," Hitori said.  "I could drive you 
ladies to the hospital if you'd like me to."

Karei finally placed one and one together; he was the same man that 
visited Megumi earlier that day.  <She was right.  He is a Good 
Samaritan.  And very fine!>  

"I was going to drive," she said, "but thank you anyway."

Akane shook her head, displeased with the stranger's answer.  They were 
going to help them whether they liked it or not.  "We insist," she said.  
"It won't be any trouble."

"Well..."

"For God's sake!" Megumi exclaimed.  "Let them help!" 

Problem solved!

Under normal circumstance it took approximately thirty minutes to drive 
to the hospital from the apartment complex; longer if traffic was 
terrible.  But with Hitori purposely driving 5 kilometers over the 
speed limit, they reached Tokyo Memorial Hospital in twenty minutes.  
He drove up to the front of the entrance emergency room to drop Megumi 
and her companions off.

"I hate to complain," Megumi professed, "but I don't think I have 
enough strength to stand.  Tell that doctor he has to come a get me."

Hitori could fix that problem.  He handed Akane the keys.  "Could you 
park the car for me?"

Akane wryly smiled, knowing exactly what he was thinking.  "I think I 
can manage that."

Before Megumi realized it, she was out of the car and in the arms of 
her Good Samaritan.  

"Or I could take you to him," Hitori suggested.  

Through the turmoil Megumi was dumbfounded.  She couldn't believe a 
stranger was going to great lengths to help her.  Returning her mail 
was one thing.  Driving her to the hospital and carrying her inside was 
another.  (That was another thing.  Hitori was stronger than he 
appeared.)  And his girlfriend didn't seem to mind.  It was a Friday, 
so surely they had other plans.  She just couldn't understand.  Why was 
Hitori doing this?

Megumi clung to his shirt as she was struck by another contraction.  
She tried doing exactly what Hanako kept telling her on the way to the 
hospital, to breathe deeply and to concentrate on only that.  At that 
moment nothing was more important.  But it was easier said than done.  
All Megumi could concentrate on was her baby.  

Hitori felt extremely inapt.  What could he do?  Hold her hand?  He 
needed both hands to hold her!  <I always get myself into more than I 
can handle!>  The only thing he could do was keep holding her.  Maybe 
that would be enough.

The doctor met them by the front desk.  "Mitsukai-san, I hope you like 
being rushed.  You're going to be rushed to a room on the maternity and 
I'll be there as quickly as possible to see if we should use any 
medication or not."

"That's fine with me," she breathed.  "Just stop this!"

He pointed at Hitori.  "Are you the father?"

There were a variety of ways Hitori could reply.  He could be 
sarcastic, vulgar, irate, or all of the above.  He could even lie, but 
under the circumstances, he chose the direct approach.  

"No!" 

"Oh..." The doctor cleared his throat as he flagged a nurse down.  "Bring 
a wheelchair and take Mitsukai-san to room 307.  Make sure you have a 
fetal monitor hooked up by the second I'm there."


~*~*~


When Takara left the hotel, he had no destination in mind.  His only 
desire was to have some time to sort everything out, if it were 
possible.  He couldn't do that back at the hotel.  The very reason for 
his problems stayed in the same room as he.  Not only that, he was 
married to her. 

He spent his time at a public playground.  Mothers and fathers watched 
their children act their age in wonderful innocence.  Watching them was 
therapeutic to him.  He remembered the time his daughters were that 
small.  He and Anjeru took Karei and Megumi to the park and watched 
them as these parents watched their children.  Takara laughed to 
himself when he noticed one little girl in particular.  She ran past a 
group of boys and caught a dodge ball before any of them had the 
chance.  When she walked by those boys, she rubbed her victory in by 
sticking her tongue out in their faces.

She reminded Takara of Megumi when she was a little girl. 

As much as Takara loved his daughter, he was disappointed in some of 
the decisions she'd made in her life.  Watabe Joben was definitely one 
of them.  Takara never completely agreed -- in fact, he never agreed at 
all -- with Megumi's choice to move in with Joben right after 
graduating high school.  It went against his morals, they very same 
morals he knew he'd taught both of his daughters.  But what 
disappointed him even more was the fact that Megumi never told him 
about her pregnancy or about Joben leaving her.  The phone calls for 
the past six months were nothing but lies.  "Everything's fine, Papa.  
Don't worry about me."  It tore him up inside to think Megumi felt she 
had to lie to him.  Pregnant or not, Megumi was still his little girl.  
He'd never stop loving his daughters, not matter what they did.  
Disappointment only ran a certain distance, but love was endless.  
Nothing could stop it.

Soon the families began to leave.  Takara arose and walked away, not 
knowing where the road would take him next.  He was certain, however, 
that the end of the road would lead him to Anjeru once more.  He had no 
doubt that his wife would do something irrational, like buying a ticket 
back to Kobe, but that did not mean their confrontation would be 
prevent.  It would only be delayed.

Anjeru... The person he was most disappointed in was his wife.

When Takara first met her, Anjeru was a farmer's daughter.  He'd never 
imagined himself falling in love with a poor girl, but he did.  He 
wanted nothing more than to love Anjeru, to be her husband, and to give 
her whatever her heart desired.  He spoiled her, just about as much as 
he spoiled his daughters.  And during their marriage Takara did see 
some change in Anjeru.  She adapted to the aristocrat lifestyle by 
becoming a more sociable and refined woman.  Her time became occupied 
with raising their daughters and teaching them the elegance of a proper 
young lady.  (Takara, on the other hand, encouraged his girls to be 
themselves.)  Soon Anjeru became engaged with the country club, parties 
at the houses of politicians, charity banquets, and so forth.  That 
wasn't the problem.  The problem was they became more important to 
Anjeru than her family.  Takara couldn't believe he never saw the 
change in her.  Perhaps it was true that love blinded fools.  He was a 
fool all right, a fool for not knowing until it was too late.

After a walk through parts of Tokyo, it was nearing nine-thirty when 
Takara returned to the hotel.  He headed for the front desk to check if 
Karei, Megumi, or even Anjeru left any messages.  That reminded him to 
call Megumi before it got any later.  He'd been in town all day and had 
not wished her a happy birthday.  But when he saw a short, petite woman 
with lavender eyes and hair running towards him, Takara knew his plans 
was to change.

Something was wrong.

"It's Megumi, isn't it?" he asked.

Setsuko feebly nodded.  Breaking bad news was never her favorite thing 
to do.  "She went into early labor about three hours ago.  Karei-san 
and Hanako-san took her to the hospital.  I called about an hour ago to 
find out how she's doing."

Takara waited for more.  "And?" he persisted.

"They hooked her onto an IV with... I think they said a magnesium sulfate 
solution.  The contractions haven't gotten any closer, but they haven't 
stopped.  The doctor doesn't want to increase the dosage, but if there 
isn't any progress he'll have to.  And if there's no change after that, 
there's nothing they can do."

"What do you mean nothing?  Megumi will have the baby?  It's too early!"

"I know.  And the chances for that baby to survive is practically nil."

"Which hospital was she taken to?"

"Tokyo Memorial.  It's about thirty minutes from here."

"Take me there." 

Setsuko saluted him.  "Yes, sir!"


~*~*~


It was one hour before midnight when the doctor said the word Megumi 
desperately wanted to hear.

"Good news.  No baby tonight."

Megumi wiped a tear from her eyes before it trickled down her cheek.  
She could hardly believe her prayers were answered.  "Oh thank God..." 
All fear dissipated now that she knew her baby was no longer 
endangered.  She caressed her protruding stomach with a protective 
hand, realizing how blessed she was. 

"I still want to keep your overnight as a precaution," the doctor 
interjected.  "But as of right now you still have enough time to 
prepare that nursery of yours."

"Thank you, Doctor."

He bowed to show his modesty.  "One of the nurses informed me that your 
father and your friends are waiting to see you.  Would you like to see 
them?"

Karei, who has stayed with her sister the entire night, completely 
forgot Setsuko went to the hotel to inform her father about Megumi.  
Apparently, she did her job well.  

Megumi asked the doctor to send them in.  When he left the room was 
enveloped with an incorporeal essence she welcomed with open arms -- 
peace, accompanied with quiet.

"There's someone else you should thank," Karei implied.

Megumi queried, "Who?"

"Chiba-san, of course."

"Is that guy still here?"

"No, he took his girlfriend home and then went home himself.  But he 
did ask me to call him tomorrow so he could know how you're doing.  So 
that means..." She took a slip of paper from her jeans pocket and sang, 
"I got his phone number.  Do you want it, Chick?"

Megumi was not amused.  Before tonight, she thought the movies 
dramatized the birthing scene, the scene where the woman in labor would 
scream at the top of her lungs and blame everything on her husband.  
But after four and a half hours of early labor, she believed those 
scenes were not realistic enough.  If Joben somehow magically appeared 
before her in the next few minutes, she would kill him, and she would enjoy 
every minute of it.  It was his fault and nothing could change the way 
she felt.  So with the premeditation of her boyfriend's murder on her 
mind, she did have the time to even consider calling another man. 

"I'll tell you what," Megumi remarked, "Since you're the one that's 
interested in him, you call him.  You steal him away from his 
girlfriend and you date him.  I have no interest in men right now, and 
possibly not ever again."

"You say that now," Karei teased, "And in a year or two you'll meet the 
man of your dreams."

"Karei... shut up."

"All right, I will.  I guess it's the least I can do."

Takara knocked on the door before entering.  "How's my little girl?"

Megumi recalled the times when she asked her father not to call her 
that, for she wasn't a little girl anymore.  Tonight when he hugged 
her, kissed her on the cheek, and said once again that he loved her, 
Megumi was grateful she was not seen as a disgrace, a unwedded mother 
to be.  In his eyes she had not change; she was still her papa's little 
girl. 

"You had everyone worried," he said.  "I'm glad you're all right.  We 
can't let anything happen to my grandchild."

Megumi didn't fight the tears.  "Papa, I'm sorry..."

Her apologized surprised him.  "For what?"

"Lying the whole time.  I should have told you about the baby."

"Don't worry about that.  I know if things were different you would have 
told us."

If *someone* was different sounded more correct.  "Setsuko tell you 
about Oka-san?"

"She did, but let's not talk about your mother right now.  Your 
birthday is almost over and you haven't had any cake yet."

Megumi's brow rose.  She had a bad feeling about this.  "Papa, what did 
you do?"

"You mean, 'What did *WE* do!'"

Hanako's husband, Ijirashii Mamoru, blocked the doorway with his entire 
body.  Standing at six foot seven with longish blond hair and a peach 
fuzz goatee, not to mention he was carrying his sleeping three-year-old 
in his arms, no one dared to move him.  They didn't care if he were 
injured, they just knew that waking Nozomi up was not the best thing to 
do.

Mamoru made room for his wife and Setsuko to enter.  In Hanako's hands 
was a small birthday cake she'd bought earlier that day.  Her original 
plan was to mysteriously leave the restaurant and come back with the 
sweet concoction for everyone to eat.  Setsuko carried the paper 
plates, plastic forks, and napkins.  On top of the heap was a paper 
crown with the words "Happy Birthday" written in crayon by a child's 
hand.  That was Nozomi's gift for Megumi, and she was going to wear.

"Since you can't go to the party," Setsuko smiled, "then we'll bring 
the party to you.  Happy Birthday, Megumi-chan!"

Megumi grinned from ear to ear.  She couldn't have asked for better 
friends.  "Thank you, minna.  That cake does really good."  <Course, 
Karei's cooking would look good right now...>  "Wait... you're not going to 
sing, are you?"  <Please say you're not!> 

Nozomi stirred and gradually woke up, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.  
She couldn't believe she fell asleep before she visited her Auntie 
Megumi!  She asked her papa, "Is Megumi-oba still big?"  Nozomi 
couldn't pronounce "pregnant" very well, so she had to use a simpler 
word.  She couldn't understand why everyone laughed when she said it, 
though.

<At least someone agrees with me,> Megumi thought.  "Hey, Shorty.  Come 
sit beside me."

Mamoru set his daughter down on the bed.  Nozomi was a little 
hesitant to come near Megumi, because usually people that were in 
hospital beds were sick.  Megumi picked up on this, so she beckoned her 
to come over until the little girl wrapped her arms around Megumi and 
sat down as close as she could next to her.

Setsuko passed out the plates, forks, and napkins while Hanako sliced 
the cake and gave everyone a slice.  She rolled the eating tray to 
Megumi's bed and placed her slice in front of her.  Nozomi happily sat 
her plate in her lap.  The remaining chuck of cake was placed at the 
end of the tray.  Mamoru stepped out of the room and came back with 
seven small cartons of milk from the hospital cafeteria.  

"So who's going to sing?" he asked.

"No!" Megumi refused.  "No singing!"

"Then I guess we'll all sing."

Megumi covered her beet-red face to hide her embarrassment as her 
friends and family sang a chorus of "Happy Birthday," which purposely 
sounded like a cat drowning in a river.  "This is so humiliating..." she 
muttered. 

"Since we have to candles for you to wish on," Hanako said, "you have 
to give a speech."

Megumi thought for a moment of all the things she could say.  She could 
place her feelings and thoughts in eloquently words that would have 
everyone in tears.  But this was not a time for tears.  It was a time 
for celebration, for new beginnings.  So she passed up the long speech 
for something short and simple.

"There's only one thing I want to say: this is one birthday I will 
never forget."


~*~*~


February 7, 1970: three months later


On the fourteenth of January, Megumi gave birth to her beautiful baby 
girl.  She named her daughter Tenshi, for she was her mother's gift 
sent from heaven, her little angel.  Never had Megumi loved a single 
person with such an endless, pure love before.  Her heart nearly melted 
each time she looked into her daughter's eyes.  The day Tenshi was born 
was the best day of her life. 

Anjeru felt differently.  The walls she'd built around her secure world 
crumbled the night her husband left for Tokyo to visit his daughter and 
his new granddaughter.  It was not meant to be this way.  Megumi went 
against her wishes and kept that baby, when the appropriate thing was 
to give the baby to a loving couple that would take care or it.  Anjeru 
was irate, disappointed, depressed, and humiliated rolled into one ball 
of emotional yarn.  Those feelings escalated as the time for Megumi to 
arrive was approaching.  It would be the first time she saw her since 
her birthday, and her first time ever to see her daughter's child. 

The sound of a car pulling into the driveway brought Anjeru to the 
window.  She brushed the curtains away and looked outside.  Megumi's 
red Mitsubishi was parked next to her father's white Cadillac.  From 
the passenger side Karei appeared, with diaper bag in tow.  Megumi 
climbed out from the driver's side and walked around to the other side.  
That was when Anjeru got her first glance at a tiny bundle wrapped in a 
pink blanket.

"This shouldn't have happened," she said aloud to herself.

Takara grunted as he walked passed her.  "You almost got your wish at 
your daughter's expense."  Their marriage was falling apart.  He didn't 
know if it was going to last another twenty-three years.

He opened the door for his daughters, with the toll fee of holding the 
wide-eyed baby for a few minutes. 

"Hello there, pumpkin," he cooed.  "You have grown so much since I last 
saw you.  And more beautiful, just like your mama."

Anjeru agreed.  Tenshi was the ideal of perfection, but she looked 
nothing like her mother.  While the eyes were the same, there was no 
doubt that Tenshi would grow up to look just like her father, a 
reminder of the past.

"Would you like to hold her?" Megumi asked her mother.  "I promise she 
won't spit up on you or anything like that."

Anjeru opened her mouth to protest, but before she could utter a word 
Takara gently placed the baby in her arms.  Tenshi gazed up at her with 
her huge, chocolate eyes and innocent smile.  Anjeru couldn't smile.  
The exterior of her heart did not melt.  She couldn't feel any 
connection, or any love.  She was a stoic person who could no longer 
understand love or express it.  But the baby was indeed not a mistake, 
and Anjeru gradually realized why Megumi was keeping her. 

"I accept your decision, Megumi," she said, continuing to stare at 
Tenshi.  "She's impossible to let go of."

Megumi could have been struck down with a feather.  "Oka-san, I--"

"But I still think you should have taken my advice.  Life's going to be 
a lot tougher with the baby to take care of."

The young mother should have known there was a catch.  Her mother was 
set in her ways.  As much as Megumi prayed the birth of her daughter 
would somehow change Anjeru, it was apparent it was not meant to be. 
Nothing would ever change her.

<Oh well, I don't care.  Tenshi's worth it.> 

Tenshi squealed with delight as Karei took her turn to holding her, 
enjoying all the attention.  Megumi looked at her smile, and the future 
tribulations her mother referred to didn't matter.  Her life was now 
complete.

<Always... She's worth it all...>

======
End of Facing Mother(hood)  


06.06.01


Email: masked_maiden@hotmail.com or gracefulangel15@yahoo.com
Web Site: (a miracle romance) http://miracleromance.cjb.net/


The finished stories for "Amazing Grace" series are as follow:
	Amazing Grace: Take a Picture (one chapter)
	Amazing Grace: Facing Mother(hood) (three chapters)

The next story is: 
	Amazing Grace: Second Chances (chapter one coming soon!)